"plak!";
x 4:36 am
what's in a name
three places i'd love to visit:
1. Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch, Wales
2. Taumatawhakatangihangakoauauotamateapokaiwhenuakitanatahu, New Zealand
3. Lake Chargoggagoggmanchauggagoggchaubunagungamaugg, USA
but first let's learn how to pronounce them.
"plak!";
x 1:08 pm
understanding an introvert.
The habits and needs of a little-understood group
by Jonathan Rauch
(from http://www.theatlantic.com/doc/200303/rauch?r)
Do you know someone who needs hours alone every day? Who loves quiet conversations about feelings or ideas, and can give a dynamite presentation to a big audience, but seems awkward in groups and maladroit at small talk? Who has to be dragged to parties and then needs the rest of the day to recuperate? Who growls or scowls or grunts or winces when accosted with pleasantries by people who are just trying to be nice?
If so, do you tell this person he is "too serious," or ask if he is okay? Regard him as aloof, arrogant, rude? Redouble your efforts to draw him out?
If you answered yes to these questions, chances are that you have an introvert on your hands—and that you aren't caring for him properly. Science has learned a good deal in recent years about the habits and requirements of introverts. It has even learned, by means of brain scans, that introverts process information differently from other people (I am not making this up). If you are behind the curve on this important matter, be reassured that you are not alone. Introverts may be common, but they are also among the most misunderstood and aggrieved groups in America, possibly the world.
I know. My name is Jonathan, and I am an introvert.
Oh, for years I denied it. After all, I have good social skills. I am not morose or misanthropic. Usually. I am far from shy. I love long conversations that explore intimate thoughts or passionate interests. But at last I have self-identified and come out to my friends and colleagues. In doing so, I have found myself liberated from any number of damaging misconceptions and stereotypes. Now I am here to tell you what you need to know in order to respond sensitively and supportively to your own introverted family members, friends, and colleagues. Remember, someone you know, respect, and interact with every day is an introvert, and you are probably driving this person nuts. It pays to learn the warning signs.
What is introversion? In its modern sense, the concept goes back to the 1920s and the psychologist Carl Jung. Today it is a mainstay of personality tests, including the widely used Myers-Briggs Type Indicator. Introverts are not necessarily shy. Shy people are anxious or frightened or self-excoriating in social settings; introverts generally are not. Introverts are also not misanthropic, though some of us do go along with Sartre as far as to say "Hell is other people at breakfast." Rather, introverts are people who find other people tiring.
Extroverts are energized by people, and wilt or fade when alone. They often seem bored by themselves, in both senses of the expression. Leave an extrovert alone for two minutes and he will reach for his cell phone. In contrast, after an hour or two of being socially "on," we introverts need to turn off and recharge. My own formula is roughly two hours alone for every hour of socializing. This isn't antisocial. It isn't a sign of depression. It does not call for medication. For introverts, to be alone with our thoughts is as restorative as sleeping, as nourishing as eating. Our motto: "I'm okay, you're okay—in small doses."
How many people are introverts? I performed exhaustive research on this question, in the form of a quick Google search. The answer: About 25 percent. Or: Just under half. Or—my favorite—"a minority in the regular population but a majority in the gifted population."
Are introverts misunderstood? Wildly. That, it appears, is our lot in life. "It is very difficult for an extrovert to understand an introvert," write the education experts Jill D. Burruss and Lisa Kaenzig. (They are also the source of the quotation in the previous paragraph.) Extroverts are easy for introverts to understand, because extroverts spend so much of their time working out who they are in voluble, and frequently inescapable, interaction with other people. They are as inscrutable as puppy dogs. But the street does not run both ways. Extroverts have little or no grasp of introversion. They assume that company, especially their own, is always welcome. They cannot imagine why someone would need to be alone; indeed, they often take umbrage at the suggestion. As often as I have tried to explain the matter to extroverts, I have never sensed that any of them really understood. They listen for a moment and then go back to barking and yipping.
Are introverts oppressed? I would have to say so. For one thing, extroverts are overrepresented in politics, a profession in which only the garrulous are really comfortable. Look at George W. Bush. Look at Bill Clinton. They seem to come fully to life only around other people. To think of the few introverts who did rise to the top in politics—Calvin Coolidge, Richard Nixon—is merely to drive home the point. With the possible exception of Ronald Reagan, whose fabled aloofness and privateness were probably signs of a deep introverted streak (many actors, I've read, are introverts, and many introverts, when socializing, feel like actors), introverts are not considered "naturals" in politics.
Extroverts therefore dominate public life. This is a pity. If we introverts ran the world, it would no doubt be a calmer, saner, more peaceful sort of place. As Coolidge is supposed to have said, "Don't you know that four fifths of all our troubles in this life would disappear if we would just sit down and keep still?" (He is also supposed to have said, "If you don't say anything, you won't be called on to repeat it." The only thing a true introvert dislikes more than talking about himself is repeating himself.)
With their endless appetite for talk and attention, extroverts also dominate social life, so they tend to set expectations. In our extrovertist society, being outgoing is considered normal and therefore desirable, a mark of happiness, confidence, leadership. Extroverts are seen as bighearted, vibrant, warm, empathic. "People person" is a compliment. Introverts are described with words like "guarded," "loner," "reserved," "taciturn," "self-contained," "private"—narrow, ungenerous words, words that suggest emotional parsimony and smallness of personality. Female introverts, I suspect, must suffer especially. In certain circles, particularly in the Midwest, a man can still sometimes get away with being what they used to call a strong and silent type; introverted women, lacking that alternative, are even more likely than men to be perceived as timid, withdrawn, haughty.
Are introverts arrogant? Hardly. I suppose this common misconception has to do with our being more intelligent, more reflective, more independent, more level-headed, more refined, and more sensitive than extroverts. Also, it is probably due to our lack of small talk, a lack that extroverts often mistake for disdain. We tend to think before talking, whereas extroverts tend to think by talking, which is why their meetings never last less than six hours. "Introverts," writes a perceptive fellow named Thomas P. Crouser, in an online review of a recent book called Why Should Extroverts Make All the Money? (I'm not making that up, either), "are driven to distraction by the semi-internal dialogue extroverts tend to conduct. Introverts don't outwardly complain, instead roll their eyes and silently curse the darkness." Just so.
The worst of it is that extroverts have no idea of the torment they put us through. Sometimes, as we gasp for air amid the fog of their 98-percent-content-free talk, we wonder if extroverts even bother to listen to themselves. Still, we endure stoically, because the etiquette books—written, no doubt, by extroverts—regard declining to banter as rude and gaps in conversation as awkward. We can only dream that someday, when our condition is more widely understood, when perhaps an Introverts' Rights movement has blossomed and borne fruit, it will not be impolite to say "I'm an introvert. You are a wonderful person and I like you. But now please shush."
How can I let the introvert in my life know that I support him and respect his choice? First, recognize that it's not a choice. It's not a lifestyle. It's an orientation.
Second, when you see an introvert lost in thought, don't say "What's the matter?" or "Are you all right?"
Third, don't say anything else, either.
"plak!";
x 8:42 pm
the music quiz
1. Put your music player on shuffle.
2. Press forward for each question.
3. Use the song title as the answer to the question even if it doesn’t make sense. NO CHEATING!
4. With the answers, give your own comments on how they relate to the questions.
HOW ARE YOU FEELING TODAY?
Aces High (Live)
kinda apt huh
HOW DO YOUR FRIENDS SEE YOU?
Song 2
probably the "WOOOHOOOO!!" being the answer
WILL YOU GET MARRIED?
The Mystic Forest
erpx.
WHAT IS YOUR BEST FRIEND'S THEME SONG?
welcome to hell
omg this can't be true!!!
WHAT IS THE STORY OF YOUR LIFE?
one night only (extended version)
1 night. and its extended. how nice.
WHAT WAS HIGH SCHOOL LIKE?
liar
i wasn't.
HOW CAN YOU GET AHEAD IN LIFE?
flight of icarus
flight of icarus is a tale of how an ignoramus flew to his DEATH. fucked up.
WHAT IS THE BEST THING ABOUT YOUR FRIENDS?
walk away
shows i have very loyal friends huh
WHAT IS IN STORE FOR THIS WEEKEND?
paranoia
probably happening in my dream
TO DESCRIBE YOUR GRANDPARENTS?
we be burnin'
yeah my paternal side's all cremated already.
HOW IS YOUR LIFE GOING?
demonizer
true true.
WHAT SONG WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
n dey say
whatever they say, i wouldn't be able to hear it.
HOW DOES THE WORLD SEE YOU?
for whom the bell tolls
how does the world see, not voice out !!
WILL YOU HAVE A HAPPY LIFE?
changes
probably a tumultuous one.
WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS REALLY THINK OF YOU?
POWER
as in 'power seh' or 'wa lao power hungry'??
DO PEOPLE SECRETLY LUST AFTER YOU?
breaking free
i broke free from one who did.
HOW CAN I MAKE MYSELF HAPPY?
don't look back in anger!!!
OMG THIS IS SO FITTING!!!!!
WHAT SHOULD YOU DO WITH YOUR LIFE?
pulse of the maggots
i suppose that can be liberally translated to 'take it slow at a worm's pace'
WILL YOU EVER HAVE CHILDREN?
broken glass
doesn't sound like yes.
WHAT SONG WOULD YOU STRIP TO?
Doom
oooh.
IF A MAN IN A VAN OFFERED YOU CANDY, WHAT WOULD YOU DO?
overture
return the overture. give a candy too.
WHAT DOES YOUR MOM THINK OF YOU?
cicatriz
it means scar in spanish. rugged perhaps? she sees me as the young kid pushed around by the older bullies still.
WHAT IS YOUR DEEP DARK SECRET?
sick love song
shhhhhhhhhhhhhh.......
WHAT IS YOUR MORTAL ENEMY'S THEME SONG?
raindrops by chopin
that's probably myself
WHAT IS YOUR PERSONALITY LIKE?
maniac
all my friends will nod. and i will laugh.
WHAT SONG WILL BE PLAYED AT YOUR WEDDING?
where'd you go
i missed you so....
WHAT BEST DESCRIBES THE ANSWERS IN THIS JOURNAL?
what's my age again
19. where i'm envied by most ppl in army for i am as young as i can be.
"plak!";
x 1:21 am
wa liew eh
Money can buy some things... like my disrespect. || Life is good without you. It was a miracle though, because of you. says:
like see if you can hide your rifles in your underwears
eyes so small, they might as well be the small print on a mortgage says:
i already have one in my underwear
Money can buy some things... like my disrespect. || Life is good without you. It was a miracle though, because of you. says:
you only have a gun la
Money can buy some things... like my disrespect. || Life is good without you. It was a miracle though, because of you. says:
-_-
"plak!";
x 11:35 pm
the great Sim Lim sale
comex 2007. there weren't really plenty of retailers and choices to choose from. all u get are large conurbated booths selling the same thing that can't be found in another place. like 1 big shop sold RAM. no one else did. 1 big shop sold games. no one else did. 2 shops competing for anti-virus sales. and lots of shops selling made in China cheap assorted(i mean junk) goods which probably took up entire quadrants of the expo halls. the whole atmosphere was simply 'the great Sim Lim sale'.
that didn't stop me from buying stuff that were little cheaper than outside. like another stick of 1 gb ram that cost under 60, and a norton anti virus that cost less than 50 and came with a 10 bucks cashcard, ugly 'turtle' bag and a cd compartment case. now my comp's got dual channel configuration for total of 2 gigabytes. my sis wonders if i've mutated into a computer geek. i have not, i must insist. there are real ones out there!
"plak!";
x 3:23 pm