I don't wanna fall to pieces ,
i juz wanna sit & stare at u .
I dun wanna talk about it ,
coz im in love with u .
chocolates induce death in dogs-it's true
being accused of having something against each and every one of my classmates. sweeping statements are a no-no. i've nothing against any of my classmates. clear as that. whether i end up quarrelling with 'all' my classmates by the end of j2, that's MY business. i will decide what to do at each point in time cause i have tasks to accomplish. if u say i'm gonna quarrel with all my classmates eventually, first one would be you. i would have no qualms about it won't you say. forgive me for being scary. for my violence in school. it's me. it's all about getting the work done. have you all understood how much pressure i am facing to do my stuff? it's hard getting a balance, and my lack of sleep no matter how many hours has been causing a short temperament. of course it is a nice feeling to know that most classmates are concerned at times. i had to take all the blame cos i 'didn't allocate work properly'. not much time to do up, how much can i allocate. i can't trust, so that's why i end up doing it myself and getting reprimanded for being so. who has ever known. and that i must get members out of my group to get things done, cos i know they are people i can trust(to do work)? ur good friends in school, those who hang around you, may be the best people to trust in ur thoughts yea, but it doesn't mean they are those who would definitely work to the best of their abilities for you, or even put in that little bit of effort. of course i know everyone should have learnt something, so i prefer not to say it in person and to keep it online, in text alone. what mrs toh was unhappy about was that a class leader should allocate tasks to different members, and not to do the task himself. 'i'm very sure there's only one person doing all the work.' i'm sure it was a very unpleasant moment for most of us, even myself. cos it's nothing good for anyone at all. haven't heard it in person, but christabel says on her blog that her national day food comm members are bailing out on her or something. yea that day i was the only one getting scolded and the others getting praised. but if this attitude is infused in some of us, i dun believe the other groups will work smoothly. yea they certainly had more enthusiasm and noise than my group, but i hope all goes fine. i really hope i wun see anything similar to my case. where the class leader is left to rot by himself/herself(well there's only bel and chee yao). not to mention i have to be in some class mascot presentation. of course the first reaction was the four letter word, but no hard feelings. i mean we had a previous drawing of lots which was fair, but the boys didn't witness, and terence who got chosen demanded the lots be drawn again, and i got it. i can't say he was wrong to ask for it, but he couldn't accept that it was him. this attitude is to some extent present in everyone. maybe it's that he reacted quite violently to it. well suppose that's his nature. dun suppose i can do anything about it. so yea i will be fanning banana leaves with hou teng. fanning liang pei the class mascot. liang pei deserves an honorary mention. she saves my life every lesson. it's always her. and i'm glad. not like me, i can't save anyone in my group who's getting called. not shawn, not wee liang. it's just that i don't know a thing, maybe cos i'm wasting time on things like this at times at 12.39 when i start to cough and blood pressure falls and i don't ever think my sentences ever end.. but at least i know dropping maths was the first right move, though my steps now must be more cautious. i know i will have much fun on national day though i'm doing dumb crap no one likes to do. but i like to make things fun. yea. so though it will be dumb, i will ensure it will be fun. something about wearing singlet and shorts and slippers, holding banana leaves. seems that it's been modified, but well it does make for some diversion to the packed national day timetable, where we are to do this and that in like 3 hours or so. but i ay forsee trouble, cos i do have to bring the class around then, but cy or bel can do it too. so i will go fan liang pei with hou teng. hou teng's another guy i have to be thankful for. i mean every guy calls him ting mei everyday, he doesn't really mind, especially when u compare similar situations with other ppl. all along, everytime during pe, we are the only 2 who fail only standing broad jump. so used to failing it. and we've always been together for pe while the rest are like 'those who failed pull-ups' or 'those who failed 2 or more stations'. and today was the retest. mr koh taught a new method of doing broad jump. so he said guys first, this time no more ladies first. and there were only the 2 of us there! so i was kind of shocked. i usually waited for everyone to finish it before i did it. no one would be looking then. but today, all the girls were looking. *gulp* heard them talking about me. hem hem. but didn't exactly hear what they said..too bad! so the method was to extend your hands perpendicular to ur body. then, as ur hands went down, u bent ur knees, and as ur hands swung back to the original position, u thrust ur body forward. sounds incredible, but it worked. it meant only 1 swing was to be used. of course i didn't succeed the first few times, but with some encouragement i finally passed that dumb station~~~~~~ and he passed on the first attempt. guess we were so elated, we just kept smiling, even when i was sorta getting scolded and stuff, still smiling. hahahah. it's like 2 years at least. grrr i did 4 pull ups only. the last one was like 7/8 done, and i couldn't do it anymore, so i tried to jump up in desperation. first time i used this commonly used method. and it didn't work. they didn't count it. hands and legs were still very tired. during shuttle run, when i bent down that 2 times, it really hurt. my knees. ask wee liang. he always has same problems as me as in the body areas. excruciating. but a pass was all i needed, so well. sit and reach, i knew i had 'deproved' (i'm still lazy to find out the real term). so i got 38 cm. which is damn lousy. but who cares. my forehead can still touch my knee! cos my legs back muscles were so tight, that's why i just couldn't push in front anymore. but a pass, all that i needed. so i didn't care. even my pushups were trouble. did only 43-3. 3 off cos of violations. and my stomach is the one feeling stretched after every physical activity, so it was really tormenting too. we saw our coach on wednesday. i mean we saw him the second time now, he still is as great to me. for he is able to influence and manipulate very well. with morning pe on wednesdays too, my hockey practices have become more tough than most other guys. ah yea, bear with it i will. captain and vice- captain were announced too. jason and guang wu. secretary/treasurer was shafiq. cos he was absent, he got sabotaged. quartermasters are me and justin seng. lucky he's also from cat high. but i volunteered for god knows what reasons, and he was asked to become qm. okay, at least it means we two have something more in common now, rather than just same alma mater that's it. 22 guys, and 11 roles on the field. there would be constant rolling substitution, and i hope i can make it in the school team. or else, what would i be there for? just remembered mark told me he could make me vice cap if he wanted to, but i clearly showed i was just not interested in all that. of course, that was so long ago. fame's just not for me. started to get teased about being a sai gang king on wednesday itself; not to say seng was spared. haha..his retort was ' qm is supposed to order ppl to do things, not do things himself'. no one responded to that, perhaps only with silly laughter.then i thought of what just happened the day before.. i didn't get scolded for no cause. mrs toh kept repeating well-done. and i owe my thanks to terence, hou teng and adeline, jian qi and chee wei. as i so sarcastically told her, adeline's the brain, i'm the mouthpiece. cos i didn't think much. and adeline did the thinking and told them to me. terence and hou teng for the creation of the actual product. jian qi and chee wei for their ps skills. without them two, it would never have worked. and of course, i must stress they could have just declined my request for help and left me to die and suffer...but instead, they said it's not a problem at all and went all the way to help me. you know you're having a nice day when ur work is distributed efficiently this way. all smiles, everyone's happy, no black faces, no guilt, solomanship nonexistent, no ugly scenes which i intentionally create. i shouldn't do that, especially when it's my friends i'm dealing with, but until the day i get more than an 'orh' followed by inaction/just an acknowledgement that he's been hearing what you've saying and that's it, i don't know what best to do. so i do wrong stuff. very very wrong and ugly. for which i'm sorry. maybe threats next time would work. threats with consequences, not weapons. i'm not a gangster after all:) (lame). this is so long cos it's meant for me to read. dun think anyone would bother to plough through this garbage actually, so i feel quite secure here. but nothing that i should hide anyway, transparency's the way to go ain't it. many thanks to chee wei for showing me concern and pulling me back from the brink of insanity. i really owe lots to some of my classmates. i perhaps appear as very lost at times, gonna need help when it's so. after all, you all promised to support me when u all chose me as class leader..of course there have been exceptions huh. but we're friends after all, that i confess i forget easily. my memory's bad, so i know i wun remember anything much that happens. memory's bad but that doesn't stop me from forgetting my wife used to piece jigsaw puzzles with one hand. so busy nowadays, but u still shower me with ur care and concern isn't it. hah. i'm sweet cos i learnt it from you. i just didn't want to talk to anyone online today,except you. i've so many things in my head that i wanna say. but i'm confused as to what they are. so i shall not say it then.
herr vs heryk vs herrick o9o488
33`o5
seventeen (:
AJC
loves history, geography and economics irresponsible class rep :P
ex-hockey qm(((((=
~ skenderlers`
Vocalist in "Heryk and Friends" (what a gay name =D) 4p@t3ht|c atheist
so glad to know you
.. i've been happier ever since
"plak!";